Heh...

Don't even know why I'm writing this, because no one will probably read it. Whatever. I'm starting to learn a few tough lessons in life. One being, that you can't ever get to comfortable. What you think you have can just vanish right before your very eyes. Some cases it's necessary. I'm trying to program my brain to think that my last day on earth is tomorrow. Seems easy, but when your entire life was lived thinking that things matter, not so easy. It's like trying to get clockwork go in reverse. Things are going to break, but destruction is a form of creation, I suppose. Music is the only thing that I can really truly depend on in life, because it's what I make of it. I've recently acquired a taste for the blues; Buddy Guy being the one who invited me into it's warm, soulful embrace. It speaks to me in a way that's so enticing, but difficult to understand, much like everything else, haha. Being confined in this suffocating, beige cubicle isn't helping ANYTHING, but I'll just have to live with that aspect. I need to learn how to care about myself more than I care about others, which is a HUGE change. If you're my friend, I'll pour my heart out for you, and leave nothing left for me...well, I started writing this in the morning, and now it's the afternoon, and my mood has kind of changed. I feel a little better. Things will soon fall into place, I hope.

Alex.